Sweat Does a Body Good

When my friend, Teresa, asked me to join her for a Bikram Hot Yoga class I said “yes” before I remembered how hot it really gets during class. It wasn’t until I opened the door to the yoga room that I remembered. At first I was greeted by the distinct odor of sweaty feet. Yes, that eau de funky smell is an intrinsic part of every Bikram yoga studio I’ve ever been in. And I’ve only been in two. But don’t worry. You get used to the smell pretty quickly. Well, at least I did.

After I got past the stink, I remembered how the heat grows on you. I breathed it in and let it linger inside and out. It tickled my skin and flushed my face.  Two thoughts raced through my mind. “What am I doing here?” and “Why isn’t that man in front of me wearing a shirt?”

I looked around the heated room. More people were showing up and saving their spots with their yoga mats. Teresa was smart – we got there early so we could snag the spot closest to the wall. I only had to contend with one person next to me instead of two. I do the same thing in my regular yoga class as well. It makes me wonder how yogic is being a creature of habit?

Where was I? Oh yes. I was looking around the room. I couldn’t help but notice the other half dressed people. Men with no shirts. Girls in yoga bathing suits. Maybe I’m old. Maybe I’m fat. Maybe I’m closed minded but for Pete’s sake, put a shirt on. I don’t want to see your belly button.

Half way through class I wished, oh how I wished, that I wore a yoga bathing suit. I was dying in my capris sweat pants and I soaked through my tank top. I didn’t care if the girl next to me had to look at my flabby belly. I was hotter than hot and dripping rivers of sweat onto my mat. Note to self: Next time wear less clothing.

What exactly did I get out of this class? Why would anyone put themselves through 90 minutes of yoga in 105 degree heat?  After I got over myself and my internal crotchetiness I remembered how much I loved doing hot yoga. It gives you that feeling of being wrung out and cleansed from the inside out. My muscles were lengthened and strengthened. My spine was flexed and twisted to release toxins and stress. I felt stronger, taller, and completely blissed out.

When class was over and I was laying in shavansana, I didn’t have to remember how good hot yoga felt. I got to experience it all over again for the first time.

My Word for 2012 – FITNESS

I stopped making New Year Resolutions years ago. As soon as I make them, I break them. Resolutions, in my mind, are too big, too rigid, too heavy. Like once I make a resolution I’m stuck with the pink elephant sitting on my lap.

A couple of years ago I adopted a word for the new year ahead. Last year my word was focus. Looking back at 2011, I think I did a fine job of focusing on what I wanted to accomplish so that I wouldn’t go bonkers while my husband was deployed. This year my word is

FITNESS

Life happens. I got older. I got fatter. I got (ahem) lazy. Richard came home from deployment and I was no longer eating salad in a bag. He loves to cook. I love to eat. We have a love-love relationship. Except my metabolism came to a screeching halt. My energy went south for vacation (and forgot to take me along.) I became a slug.

Too make matters worse, my boobs are woefully, pathetically, and embarrassingly lopsided. Most of you know that when I had breast cancer I surrendered my left breast. In its place is a lovely little implant. And right now, compared to my right breast it is teeny, oh so teeny tiny. I want my matching set back!

The new year approached, I knew what I had to do and the word Fitness chose me. Not just physical fitness but mental fitness, emotional fitness, and spiritual fitness. You could say I want to be well rounded.

To cover all my bases, I’ve implemented the following changes (and one reason I’m writing this post now as opposed to January 1, is because once in a row doesn’t count)

I’m on the 90 Day Fitness challenge at the dojo.

I’m on the 90 Day Body By Vi Challenge (super cool, super good!)

I’m on my yoga mat every single morning for 30 minutes BEFORE I go to work

I’m at the dojo 3 times a week for Muay Thai Kickboxing

I’ve eliminated coffee and alcohol from my diet. (And let me just add right here that I already notice a HUGE difference in how I feel. For now, no more Chianti or Malbec and good-bye Melita European Dark Roast. Hello green tea and lemon water…

I already feel skinnier :-)

I want to look good. I want to feel good. I wish there was there was a slugbegone spray mist I could simply squirt on myself but this Fitness thing is all about being unlazy in all my habits.

In an effort to be honest, I started the year off weighing 169 lbs or 172 lbs depending on which scale I stood on, and my measurements are super wonky – 38, 38, 44. My goal is to be 135 lbs, 36, 26, 36. Once I reach that, I’ll reassess.

If you’d like to learn more about the Body By Vi Challenge, if you’d like to join me with a Challenge of your own, I invite you to check out my page. After five days of using the Visalus products, I’m so impressed that I signed on as a distributor. I’ll be posting my results every two weeks. With photos and everything.

Breathe In…Breathe Out

I’ve had a constant stream of people in and out of my home since Christmas Eve and yes, I’m peopled out. Two words that showed up in my journal last night were Breathing Space. Here I am a certified yoga teacher and I was feeling suffocated in my own home.

It happens to the best of us.

And so I started thinking. How do I create room to breathe? How do I create the space to step back and take a deep breath?

The last time I felt overwhelmed in my own home I noticed the feeling first. I allowed awareness of the feeling to push back the ego who wanted to say nothing and keep plodding along. With awareness comes my ability to speak up. So I did. But this time, it was my husband who noticed and asked if I was “feeling lost in my house.”

At first I brushed it off with a laugh. Who me? No way. I’m not lost. I’m just irritable, crabby, moody, and distracted. I hate when he’s right.

Sometimes even I don’t pick up on my own feelings. After an hour or so with my journal, I realized I was in much need of Breathing Space. The constant stream of people in and out, not to mention three generations living under one roof, coupled with an out of town house guest, finally got to me.

The guest left yesterday and there’s one more large family gathering tomorrow night. Well, it’s technically the start of Family Dinner night, but this time, there will be a lot more people showing up for beef stroganoff and sour dough bread. I’m armed with awareness that I am peopled out but I also know that I can breathe anywhere. Not autonomic breathing, but conscious breathing, or pranyama. My breath is my life force and with it I can control stress and reduce tension.

To help myself find my own breathing space, I cleaned my room and rolled out my yoga mat. My intention is simple: to reignite my morning yoga practice with lots of sun salutations and breath work.

I’d love to hear from you. What are you doing to create Breathing Space for you?

The Rear View Mirror

The clock is ticking and 2012 is almost here. I’m excited. Are you?

Before we get dressed up for parties and ring in the new year, can I ask a few questions? I appreciate your indulgence.

  • What went right for you in 2011?
  • Did you try something new?
  • Did you fall in love?
  • Did you break a bad habit?
  • Did you accomplish a goal?
  • Did you make any significant changes for yourself?
  • What are you thankful for in 2011?

As I look in the rear view mirror, 2011 was an amazing year. Although my husband was deployed in the Middle East for most of the year, we met in Key West for a very romantic 15 day vacation in March. Little did I know that six weeks later he’d be home under less than ideal circumstances, but he was home to be with his mom when she passed away.

Dinner at Salute - Key West - 2011

In May I walked a marathon in a day to raise money for breast cancer research. A few blisters and rain didn’t bother me and I got to walk with Team BellaDonna – a great group of women and survivors.

Celebrating Mile 26!

I took a trip out west to see my youngest daughter, Christina, in Lake Tahoe. We took a mom and daughter trip to Yosemite and San Francisco. We stayed with my Aunt Peg on her ranch in Lodi, California. I’m pretty sure my daughter found Nirvana while riding my aunt’s horse, Champ.

Christina and Champ - Blue Moon Ranch - May 2011

I attended my brother Christopher’s wedding in June and welcomed my new sister-in-law, Letty, into our family.

Chris and Letty Bell – June 2011

I ran…err…rather I slogged through the mud fest known as the Warrior Dash. Yup. I did! And I did it with my martial arts sistas Jaime, Laurie H., Laura B., Laurie N., Laura F., and Faye.

That's me in the muddy skirt and olive green tank top - Last Obstacle - Warrior Dash

I celebrated my Aunt Cal’s 80th birthday in grand style on Grand Isle, Vermont in July. I love the time I spend with my cousins and my 2nd family in Vermont.

Happy Birthday Aunt Cal!

I welcomed my second grand baby and first grandson into our family. Caleb Murphy Russell was born on July 6, 2011. He’s six months old now and rolling all over the place!

Caleb Murphy Russell

I also welcomed my youngest nephew, Brayden Michael Ott, into the family. Baby B was born on July 4 – a month early, but boy oh boy has he caught up! Caleb and B are the same weight and height!

Brayden and Caleb being held by each other's mommies :-)

After being happily unemployed for 5 months, I started a new job in July. So far so good. I like it.

In August, I welcomed my husband, Richard, home for good. And I checked out for awhile so I could check in with him. I love our bubble.

He's really home....

My daughter Jessica was home for the summer and I love that I re-introduced her to martial arts. She went to Thai Kickboxing classes with me and I could tell she was just as hooked as I am. Jessica also adores her niece and nephew.

Auntie Jessica with new nephew Caleb and niece Olivia

Richard and I spent Labor Day weekend at the beach in Maine. We celebrated our 5th anniversary by attending the Scottish Highland Games at Loon Mountain in mid September.

Rick and CJ playing in the waves - Ocean Park, Maine

My good friend Teresa and I started writing our book. For real. We each committed to writing 1,200-1,500 words per week. And we’re tackling all the issues and challenges we’ve encountered as stepmoms and how we handled them – mistakes and all.

November and December have been a whirlwind. Richard and I have been busy laying new tile in the kitchen, changing out the electric stove for a gas stove, and finally, pulling up the old carpet and putting in hardwood flooring in our living room. The house I bought in 2003 as a single mom with two teenage daughters is finally becoming home. I think I’ll stay awhile.

My new floor - thanks honey!

Christmas came and went. The weekend was a happy blur of good food and joy with friends and family. Having my husband home for good – priceless.

Merry Christmas!

Before you turn your back on 2011, I hope you will take a moment to reflect on all that was good and right with your year and I hope you’ll share with a comment!

Blessings to you and your family,

Peggy

My Why

Cactus Blooms by Peggy Nolan

Why do I blog? Why do I write? Why do I keep putting my thoughts and my experiences on paper and in cyber space? This is one reason.

I received this email the other day:

Dear Peggy,

I stumbled across your site while typing in “change your life after cancer”

I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 21, I’ve had a mascetomy, a stem cell transplant,a lobectomy, lots of radiation, chemo, and just the other day a hysterectomy! Honey I am tired!!!! I’m 36 now.

I really like how positive your site is. I told my husband that I am done. He’s really not taking this well and said I was “giving up”

Well I’m not dead! I told him and I just am sick of being sick. I’m going to do things that I want to do and just have a good time.

The thing is is that I enjoy living and I’m unafraid of dying. I equally welcome both. Life is not guaranteed and even though I’ve have cancer, I’ve also had so much fun in life.

Thank you for your blog and I’m happy I found it.

Blessings-
Tasha

***

Thank you Tasha. And Thank You to anyone who is struggling with something yet still living life on their terms. In the dojo we say “resistance makes you stronger.” In life, the struggle makes you stronger. Just ask the caterpillar after it becomes a butterfly.